It will never stop.

Why do we really care what we do with our time? Everywhere you go you are going to get bored. You will never stop getting bored. You will never stop feeling hungry or tired or sad. It doesn't matter how many times you try to fill these voided feelings with food and sleep and parties and drugs. They will always come back. You will constantly be asking yourself if you are doing the right thing, or what it is that you should actually be doing. You will always question what you are not supposed to be doing. Is this one of those things? You will always feel restless and yet unmotivated. You cannot ever escape anxiety or irritation. You will always need to cry and some point and to someone. Someone who is wondering when you will stop crying. You will always feel fear. Always fear the unknown. Time will always be right there... staring you down, and laughing. Laughing because you're either wishing it would stay, or just go away. Laughing because you have absolutely no control over it. You have no control over the way you feel. You have no control. Over anything.

But you will always have a chance to laugh. And if you open yourself up enough, you may even fall in love. Regardless of whether or not love is real or lasts, it can make you cheerful for at least a little while. Something will most always come along to make you feel happy; again. And kittens will always be cute.

~2005